(Don’t impose your thoughts on other people)



What I really want to say here now, is “there are some people who pretend to be our friends, and impose their thoughts on us”. In our lives, we’ll get to meet people who will affect our lives. Some are genuine friends, while some just pretend to be such in order to impose their thoughts on us.



Some instances of imposing their thoughts on us are when they ask things such as, “My dress looks nice, doesn’t it?”, “I’m a good mother to my daughter, aren’t I?”, “I made it by myself, am I great?””, “I’ve studied something for acquiring a qualification. I’m great, aren’t I?”, and so much more. They must foist their views on others, mustn’t they?



Generally speaking, people don’t tend to be interested in other people’s matters except for those special or close to them. Realistically speaking, we don’t care so much about what you wear, how much you love your child, or what you made. They don’t affect us in any ways and are trivial to us.



From my point of view, these types of people lack the value of “empathy”. I have also met people like that in the past. They share a common denominator, which is, they are all full of themselves, and they make everything about themselves. They are egocentric individuals.



I have one example. When I happened to talk about my asthma experience, genuine friends would be interested in my condition or situation, and ask me “when did the asthma begin?”, “Do you still go to hospital?”, “Oh! you must have gone through a hard time”, such words or actions which shows empathy. 



On the other hand, those who force their values soon would take over the topic and change it into something like, starting from “I (or my daughter) have this experience. It was really dreadful” and be engrossed in themselves, and never mention my topic at all.



In my opinion, this type of people would become lonely eventually. Their circle of friends will grow smaller and smaller. Others might tend to distance themselves from such egocentric or narcissistic people. Of course, you would, because you don’t want to be involved with such people.



Everyone is busy living their lives. They would rather want to spend their precious time for people who matter the most than listening to the useless things about others. Love, jobs, friendships, everything must be two-way. If it’s only one-way, it will implode and lead to destruction of friendships and relationships.



・common denominator: 共通点


be engrossed in~: ~に没頭する、夢中になる

circle of friends:友好関係、仲間